So the diary seems not to be Tony’s grandmother’s after all. The references to “Mr. Parkford” had seemed a formal, but perhaps not too unusual, way to refer to her husband, but I was letting that go until I came to the entry for May 7th: “[Children] bought their mother a book and some flowers for Mother’s Day.” So is this the nanny keeping daily notes of the children’s activities and meals? More research is required.

In the meantime, here’s another entry (and yes, as you might guess from reading this, the Parkfords were big fans of the horses. I spent my first Mother’s Day nursing a colicky Ben at the side of a race track because it was such a treat for Tony’s mom.):

Saturday, July 16th, 1938

Left home at 7:30 A.M. for British Columbia. Went up the coast straight through S. Barbara, S. Maria, San Luis Obispo, Salinas, San Francisco to Petaluma.

Ate a picnic lunch consisting of turkey sandwiches, milk, cucumbers, fruit — near Pismo Beach. Collected some Associated stamps along the way. Got a glimpse of some of the horses at the Rodeo at Salinas. Saw Hoover’s home and part of the Stanford campus at Palo Alto. Saw Bay Meadows and Tanforan at San Francisco.

In trying to find Golden Gate bridge, a corporal in training camp told us we were going too fast. Got a glimpse of Palace of Fine Arts. Saw the Goodman’s home and the Fisher’s home. Enjoyed the bridge hugely — saw Alcatraz and San Quentin. Went through a tunnel.

Ate dinner at [illegible] at San Rafael and then drove to Petaluma and spent night at Petaluma hotel. Bed at 10:30 P.M. Tired. Drove 486 miles today.

Everybody’s garage holds some mix of trash and treasure; ours is slightly more interesting — to me, at any rate — because it also holds boxes and bags of things saved by Tony’s parents. They didn’t move often, but when they did, apparently, not a lot of weeding or sorting happened first. So cookbooks and ticket stubs and artwork and bills and jewelry and newspaper clippings and silverware all wound up in boxes together, and here we are, years later, still finding surprises.

A large plastic tub of crumpled newspaper. On closer inspection, the crumpled newspaper was protecting small clay objects: Pre-Colombian pottery from Tony’s parents’ art collection. Glad I didn’t toss it into the recycling.

A bag of cat litter. We don’t have a cat. Tony’s parents never had a cat.

2 small Calphalon saucepans (one with a lid!)

The 2 backseat headrests for our Hyundai.

Tony’s 1st and 2nd grade report cards. He did very well.

One large, square copper plate for etching. Unetched.

Tony’s grandfather’s real estate license.

3 silver trays.

A checkbook-sized magnetic Scrabble game (excellent!)

Copies of the New York Times, San Francisco Chronicle, San Francisco Examiner and L’Italia, dated November 23, 1963, reporting on JFK’s assassination.

A wine notebook, with tasting notes from the 1950s and 60s.

Boxes of slides from European travels, circa 1950.

A small cardboard box containing Remington cartridges, apparently from the previous owner of this house. Need to call SFPD for information on disposing of these.

A binder with notes, sketches, and a full proposal for a sculpture titled “Flying Flag” that Tony’s dad submitted to San Francisco’s Hyatt Regency hotel (a hotel that had previously commissioned a sculpture from him).

Tony’s grandmother’s journal for 1938, kept in a leather-bound “Business Yearbook” embossed with her husband’s name. This treasure deserves fuller examination; in the meantime, a brief excerpt:

Thursday, April 21, 1938

[Tony’s mother Nancy was 11; her brother Geoffrey a year younger]

Usual school day. Nancy had a French lesson at 3:10 P.M. Went to Dr. Dillon’s office at 4:30 PM. Geoffrey played at home after school. Nancy has 4 new petticoates — length 38 in., size 14.
Breakfast: orange juice, oatmeal, bacon, toast, milk
Lunch: steak, c. potatoes [creamed?], beans, spinach, rhubarb, milk, cake
Supper: tomato soup, cottage cheese, scrambled eggs, jello, cake, milk

We have a long way to go, but we might some day be able to park both cars in the garage. In the meantime, I’m going to be reading Tony’s grandmother’s journal and unearthing more about family life in the 1930s. Stay tuned…

Edited to add, I’ve had the chicken pox! Good thing my mom reads my blog…

A meme I saw over at Libby‘s. Blogger’s bold didn’t look so bold, so I’ve starred the ones I’ve done.

*1. Started your own blog
*2. Slept under the stars
*3. Played in a band
*4. Visited Hawaii
*5. Watched a meteor shower
*6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
*8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
*10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
*12. Visited Paris
*13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
*14. Taught yourself an art from scratch – I don’t quite know what this means. Does making puff pastry count? Then I have.
15. Adopted a child
*16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty – this hasn’t been legal for a while. I’ve visited, though.
*18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
*20. Slept on an overnight train
*21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
*23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
*24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
*26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice – no, but I’ve ridden the vaporetto (less romantic, I know)
*29. Seen a total eclipse
*30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
*31. Hit a home run –it was 5th grade softball, but I did it.
*32. Been on a cruise — just this summer, to celebrate my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary with the whole family
*33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
*36. Taught yourself a new language — Hebrew, from my friend’s Hebrew school books. It didn’t take.
*37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
*38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
*39. Gone rock climbing
*40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
*41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt — no, though I have seen other, less predictable, geysers erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
*45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
*50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
*51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
*52. Kissed in the rain
*53. Played in the mud
*54. Gone to a drive-in theater
*55. Been in a movie – do student productions count? then yes.
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
*59. Visited Russia – I have to admit I was 2, so I don’t remember it at all
*60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
*62. Gone whale watching — and also just happened to see some from the beach in Stinson recently
*63. Got flowers for no reason
*64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
*67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
*69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
*70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
*71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
*73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
*75. Been fired from a job — and I was so happy about it, too!
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
*80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican — I hung around outside for awhile, though.
*82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
*84. Had your picture in the newspaper – most recently here in the NY Times.
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House – like the Vatican, I’ve done a drive-by. Ben fully expects to visit President Obama in the White House when we visit D. C. in April, however.
*87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating – it was a fish, which is probably not what this meme has in mind
*88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
*90. Sat on a jury
*91. Met someone famous
*92. Joined a book club – We’re a little group that’s been meeting nearly 6 years; one wedding, one divorce (different couple), and 3 babies later, still going pretty strong.
*93. Lost a loved one
*94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
*98. Owned a cell phone
*99. Been stung by a bee
*100. Read an entire book in one day – several times, but the most memorable was probably reading all of Dorothy Sayers’ Lord Peter mysteries in ten days the summer between sophomore and junior years of high school. I was sick with something like mono and moping around reading was all I could do.

That’s 59, if I counted correctly, which leaves plenty of interesting things to do in the years to come (though I’ll continue to skip the bungee jumping and sky diving, thanks).

This comes from Outside Voice; if you’re reading, consider yourself tagged!

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? my maternal grandmother.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? oh, just a couple days ago, in frustration with my insomnia.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? I do, but it’s illegible to most.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Bacon, which I continued to eat for a year after I was calling myself a vegetarian.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Two boys

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I think so; I like to think so.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Less and less.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS. Yes.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? No; makes my neck hurt just thinking about it.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Every morning: Joe’s O’s with homemade granola, dried cranberries and milk. Even if there’s brunch happening soon, or pancakes — I need my cereal first.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? No, although the only lace-up shoes I own are my running shoes, which I kick off as soon as I’m home.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Sometimes. Then sometimes also not.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Vanilla. With chocolate sauce and salted peanuts.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Mouth.

15. RED OR PINK? Until recently it was always pink. But lately more often red: clothing, lipstick, wine…

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? That’s not such a fun thing to consider, really. Let’s just say my knees.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? Julie

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? Oh, there’s no need.

19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Grey slippers

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Popcorn and red wine right now.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The kids chattering in bed, my friends clicking away on their keyboards.

22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Blue

23. FAVORITE SMELLS? Bread dough, freshly bathed boys, newly mown grass

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My friend L

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Yes! but we’ve never met 🙁

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? It used to be baseball but lately, basketball.

27. HAIR COLOR? Brown

28. EYE COLOR? Brown

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Used to; now, Lasik!

30. FAVORITE FOOD? fresh peaches, milk, dark chocolate, kale — not all together, though

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? definitely happy endings

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Who Does She Think She Is? Watch for a column on it next week

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Blue

34. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer!

35. HUGS OR KISSES? Depends on who’s giving them

36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Warm peach pie with vanilla ice cream

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Libby

38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND. Whoever doesn’t feel like it

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? Captive Bodies: American Women Writers Redefine Pregnancy and Childbirth, by my friend Mary Ruth Marotte

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Who uses a mouse pad anymore?

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? No TV last night; when I get home, there’s a tivo’d episode of Top Chef waiting for me.

42. FAVORITE SOUND. The boys talking to each other in their room after bedtime; Tony’s laugh; and lest I get too sentimental, also: loud car radio; electric mixer; clothes dryer

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Beatles

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? I’ve lived in Japan, but I guess that wasn’t being far from home; the furthest I’ve traveled from home since I moved to the States was probably Austria

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Making ice cream before breakfast

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Tokyo

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? Anybody who’s interested

This year, among many other blessings, I am thankful for good food, and family and friends who know their way around the kitchen so I don’t have to cook it all.

Mom’s Brown and Serve Wheat Germ Rolls
Butternut squash bisque
Whole berry cranberry sauce
Garlicky ginger cranberry relish
Green beans with lemon zest
Baked pearl onions
Mashed potatoes
Sweet potatoes anna
Shaved brussels sprouts with lemon and hazelnuts
Frissee salad with pear, manchego and pomegranate seeds
Wild rice, lentil and mushroom timbales
Mushroom gravy
Chestnut stuffing
Tony’s grandmother’s bread stuffing with lemon zest and parsley
Turkey and turkey gravy
Pumpkin pie
Cranberry almond crostata

Happy Thanksgiving!

Ben and Eli were playing with their homemade paper walkie-talkies. Ben was sending Eli “text messages” by writing commands on small slips of paper, walking over to Eli and reading him the message. Smoke signals would have been more efficient, perhaps, but who am I to interfere in a self-initiated game that requires none of my involvement? I’m no fool.

And so it went, with Ben writing out his messages very carefully, reading them to Eli, and then the two of them running to the meeting place:

“Eli! I’m sending you a text message. It says, “Meet me at Pier 47! That’s the dining room, ok?”

Or, “Eli! I’m sending you a text message. It says, “Meet me at Pier 23. That’s the bathroom.”

Until Eli had enough. He ran to the art table, cut out a slip of paper, wrote an indicipherable message, and ran it over to Ben.

“Ben! I’m sending you a text message! It says, “Stop bossing me!”

The end.

The new season of Top Chef has begun, and Tony and I are once again glued to the couch on Wednesday nights. It took me a little while to get in to the show; the original host was fairly insipid, and the fact that you could only see, but not taste nor smell, the dishes seemed a fatal flaw. Still, we watched, because we do love to watch people cook, and seeing chefs handle challenges like assembling delicious-looking dishes out of vending machine purchases slowly won me over. I’ve even come around to the new host, Padma Lakshmi, who doesn’t trumpet her cooking abilities but is more than just a pretty face — she knows her stuff.

This week’s challenge — a pretty straightforward appetizer, dinner, dessert; no unusual requirements or last-minute restrictions– had me shouting at the contestants. They’re only two weeks into the show, sure, but this is the fifth season: surely they’ve watched it before? They should know better than to attempt a dish with an unfamiliar ingredient (ostrich egg quiche, anybody? You didn’t have to taste it to know it was not a success.) They should know to ditch something and start over when they — and all their fellow contestants — think it’s too sweet. I’ve never seen Padma spit something out into her napkin before, but she couldn’t even swallow a bite of her lemon meringue martini with cherry surprise. Who can blame her, really? I’m not sure I would put anything called “surprise” in to my mouth.

Now I’m no Top Chef and have no aspirations to be, but I can find my way around the kitchen, and so can my Lisa, my coeditor over at Learning to Eat; recently we both happened to write about appetizer, dinner and dessert, so head on over there for some recipes. And in the meantime, I’ll keep watching what those Top Chef contestants are up to.

In Columns

Great Green Room
by Stephanie Hunt

I have a heron. A gorgeous, mysterious Great Blue. In the mornings
when the sun is bright, I pull back my bedroom drapes and look first
thing. From my window I have the slimmest keyhole view through my
neighbor’s gate out toward the harbor, where at the end of a dock he
sits. Regal, still, his pewter feathers nearly indistinguishable from
the slate sky. He is my talisman, and when I catch him there, for some
inexplicable reason my day feels charmed.

Red Diaper Dharma
by Ericka Lutz

One of my favorite Roz Chast cartoons shows a woman in her forties or fifties wearing a flowing baggy dress with a wild hairstyle and clunky jewelry. The words read: Are you entering your “Goddess” years? Have you gotten heavily into herbal teas, especially the “soothing” varieties? Has your husband recently purchased an expensive sports car? What’s with the hair? This cartoon makes me convulse with laughter and cringe with a bit too much recognition. Am I her? Am I that? Is she my future?

In Fiction

At Second Sight
by Ashley Kaufman

The birth had been an assault. Natural childbirth and pitocin should not be uttered in the same sentence, much less tried together, at least not by her. She had felt inadequate; she had felt unsafe with all those expectant faces waiting impatiently around her, and all their instructions. “Push! Harder! Come on, bear down, now, let’s get this baby out!” The voices, unconnected to bodies, pierced unevenly through the bubble that shut her off alone with the pain. And it had been a bubble. Like being underwater. She was alone inside of it. No one could reach her. No one could help her. But they could hurt her, or at least he could and did. She felt the ring of fire as he crowned, and the last of what had once been her self slipped away and she watched as what was only animal pushed a baby out. It was not the spiritual experience the natural birth proponents had promised.

Literary Mama Logo Contest

Literary Mama is turning 5 and we need a fresh look! We’re soliciting designs for a new logo that includes our name and tagline — Literary Mama: Reading for the Maternally Inclined — plus, optionally, an image that captures the spirit of the site. The winning entry will become the property of Literary Mama, to be used on our site, and on any and all Literary Mama gear. We’ll give the winning designer credit on our site, of course, plus a t-shirt and a copy of the Literary Mama anthology. Send your entries (or questions) by January 1st as jpg files (800 pixels wide) to carolinemgrant@gmail.com

Literary Mama is turning 5 and we need a fresh look! We’re soliciting designs for a new logo that includes our name and tagline — Literary Mama: Reading for the Maternally Inclined — plus, optionally, an image that captures the spirit of the site. The winning entry will become the property of Literary Mama, to be used on our site, and on any and all Literary Mama gear. We’ll give the winning designer credit on our site, of course, plus a t-shirt and a copy of the Literary Mama anthology. Send your entries by January 1st as jpg files (800 pixels wide) to carolinemgrant@gmail.com

Visit us at Literary Mama

The first I heard about the movie Baby Mama was when our accountant emailed this poster over and said “They stole your cover design!” Well, I don’t think we had a monopoly on the use of alphabet blocks, but still it somehow triggered a teeny sense of totally unreasonable resentment toward the movie, and that, coupled with a busy summer, meant I never got out to see it.

And then Sarah Palin was nominated for VP, and Tina Fey made Saturday Night Live relevant again, and I thought it might be worth checking out her movie. I wrote about it this week for Literary Mama; here’s an excerpt:

I lost sleep over the election. Partly because of my investment in the outcome, certainly, but also because for the first time since I was in my 20s, I regularly stayed up past my bedtime watching Tina Fey’s sharp Sarah Palin on Saturday Night Live. So when my family planned a relaxing weekend away with another family, I thought Fey’s recent comedy Baby Mama would be a good rental to toss in the bag. After a busy day at the pumpkin patch, we settled the kids into their beds and settled ourselves in front of the TV, prepared to be entertained.

Click on over to Literary Mama to read the rest! and while you’re there, check out columnist Karen Murphy’s newest installment of Motherhood from Afar; Elrena Evan’s Stepping Stones; Ona Gritz on Getting to Yes; and finally, if your kids are anything like mine, you’re still answering dozens of questions about the election, so check out Libby Gruner’s thoughts on political picture books in Running for Office.